We are stay-at-home moms who used to have lives. We used to have identities outside of being X’s mommy. We attended board meetings, cocktail parties, and strategy sessions. Now we wipe tushies and noses, mold minds and school projects, and try to keep our homes and their inhabitants from falling down around us. And that’s OK. That’s the right choice for us right now, and we get that. But it’s hard, and we get that, too. Our goal for Mamas Against Drama was to create a resource that other moms in the same boat could turn to for support – and hopefully a little laughter.
So guess what, we are moms who are tired of all the mama drama. We don’t care if you breastfed or bottle fed your child. We don’t care if your child is home-schooled or in pre-school, if you are die-hard about organics or if you feed your children cookies twice a day. We won’t brand you a criminal if you let your child watch TV. We are going to go out on a limb and trust that you love your children and are committed to doing right by them. Let’s make a deal – we won’t judge you if you won’t judge us. After all, we already know we’re crazy…
I used to be a normal person. I showered every morning and ate breakfast sitting down. I was the Director of Marketing for a government relations/public relations firm in Washington, DC, and before that I was the Deputy Director of Correspondence and Presidential Messages in the Clinton Administration. I knew where my keys were, I didn’t lose my purse, and I had conversations that lasted more than five minutes. Then I had kids and became a stay-at-home mom. According to the world at large, I do not work. In fact, I hear that question all of the time, “Do you think you will go back to work?” “Are you kidding me?” I would like to respond. “And give up my cushy life of eating bon bons and watching The View all day?”
The reality of being a stay-at-home mom is quite different. As the mother of a pre-schooler and twin toddlers, my day starts anywhere between 4:45am and 6:30am and is non-stop until 8:00pm (if I am lucky). Yes, it’s rewarding, it’s a blessing, and it’s the right thing for our family, but it is also challenging, draining, and at times maddening. Sarah and I started Mamas Against Drama to find support for our own efforts (and temper our own madness) and to offer support to others in the same boat. We hope you will stick with us through the journey and help us take the drama down a notch. Now I have to be on my way – the bon bons and soap operas are calling.
Follow me on Twitter @shannon1hembree
I went from being a successful professional woman who had worked at several glamorous-sounding places – including the White House where I worked for five years (and happily met Shannon) – to being a stay-at-home mom with nothing remotely glamorous about my life.
At first I freaked out. I had a major identity crisis and struggled with depression and isolation in my new role. I felt judged from all sides. I worried that working moms thought I was boring and didn’t respect me for choosing to stay at home with my young children. I worried that stay-at-home moms thought I was a terrible mother who could not cook, clean, or get excited about freestyle scarf dancing in baby music class.
Today, I have a six-year-old and a three-year-old and a much different perspective. I have developed a great amount of compassion for all mothers – regardless of their choices or decisions. Being a mother today is hard, and none of the choices are perfect. We need to support each other and make each other laugh. It’s the only way to make it through these years of screaming children, sleepless nights, and endless diaper changes without totally losing ourselves in the process…
Follow me on Twitter @sarahsknight
We at Mamas Against Drama want to hear from you. Send us your mama tips, mama laughs and literary mama submissions. We also want to hear your suggestions for future articles and your ideas for ways we can make our site a better support system for moms.